Seen and noted

BEST TV
1. Kids Co: See the child.
A mixed bag this week. Nothing spectacular and a few flaws here and there. Let's take the Thai ad. Why does Dad think a newborn baby would have even the vaguest interest in an iPhone cartoon? And why doesn't he just pick the thing up the second it just starts crying? Don't get me wrong, I'm all for love over technology but a handy iPad beats love hands down when you have to fly one of them long haul. The Manchester United shirt spot started out well but quickly became a little similar to Levis so I had to disqualify it. The fact that I was nearly beaten up by a baying mob of Manchester United fans twenty years ago doesn't come into it. No sir. (Interesting 'life hack,' squirting a chocolate thick shake at your would-be attackers somehow delays the inevitable kicking and gives you those precious seconds you need to run away and have a little cry in private.)

AMV's powerful spot just seems the most 'complete.' As a Dad it made me angry and upset, and that's all it needed to do. That's it really. Well done all.

2. Volkswagen Park Assist: Contortionist.
I so nearly went for the Lego spot but it'll take more than a line that tells me that Shell are 'polluting our kids' imaginations' to do so. I genuinely thought that Lego were using Arctic oil or something, but it turns out that Greenpeace don't like the fact that there are Shell logos on Lego models. Don't get me wrong, Arctic drilling is appalling but getting people to complain about Lego isn't going to stop it. Here's a thought, stop buying Shell petrol and fill up with a non-polluting petrol company, you know, like BP.

So the Volkswagen spot gets runner up. It lands the prop in that good old-fashioned VW way. I'm sure there's a whole pile of DPS ads with people crammed into boxes, lockers and Happy Meal cartons or something. (Note: There is.)

BEST PRINT
1. Three Mobile: Sorry for all the plane wings.
I flew to London a few weeks ago and was guilty of banging out a few of these. I got the Alps, some clouds, the place where my Mum and Dad live and the contrail of a jet that was so fucking close to the window I'm pretty sure we were all nearly killed in a horrific near miss over Belgium. Could this have been executed better? Yes, but it's a real insight about those pointless mobile shots that litter Facebook. In fact, there's a whole campaign of them come to think of it. The next one should feature friends who insist on checking into Facebook the minute they get to a Business Class Lounge. (Are you on a shoot? Really?)

2. Philips Sonicare: Suarez.
I must have seen fifty Internet memes within hours of Louis 'I tripped over and fell into the back of the defender with my teeth, thus bruising them' Suarez. And they ranged from the ridiculous to the brilliant. That's one of the problems we have. The stuff in our Facebook feeds is far funnier than the ads we write. So does this compete with the Suarez 'Jaws' poster, no, but it's a decent headline for a real client and was apparently running the next day so points to O&M London for getting it out there.

BEST OUTDOOR
1. Yugoslav Drama Theatre: Taxi Drama - Othello.
Vending machines, seemingly dangerous vehicle stunts performed to classical music, entry videos featuring agency staff pretending to be amazed consumers. It's Cannes Lite this week.

So, how do you publicise a theatre company that's putting on Shakespeare? Simple. You get taxi drivers to tell his stories to passengers in their own words and film it. A wonderful idea that shows how relevant his work still is and the visceral reactions his passengers get to a well-told story.

2. Civil Sector of Euromaidan: Silent Scream.
The Ukrainian situation was one of the first world events I followed live on Twitter – there were reports live from the barricades and a seemingly never-ending amount of images taken by people who were literally in the crosshairs. So the idea of sticking a scream on a scarf instantly appealed to me. It's such a simple idea and one that I imagine was seen by a great many people as they covered their faces with the things. Admittedly I never saw someone do it, but I hope they did. They got a Lion for it apparently.

BEST INTERACTIVE
Samsung Tunisia: Backup Memory.
Oh fuck. Entry videos. Apparently Barbie's got a LinkedIn page where she 'acts as a consultant, helping girls around the world play out their imagination, try on different careers, and explore the world around them. Our company tagline is "If you Can Dream It, You Can Be it!" I can't help thinking that Barbie also teaches little girls that having a tiny waist and perky boobs kinda helps too.

I can't help feeling sorry for the Itau Bank in Brazil. They created a special football that collected the heartbeats of Brazilians and then handed it over to the Brazilian team - who then went on to stop a good few of them dead after Germany's seventh.

1. The best one here is an app that allows people with Alzheimer's to know who's in their immediate vicinity, be it their son, daughter, best friend etc. Just the thought of someone not being able to recognise their own family is horrific, so I hope this gets out there and works for people with this horrible disease.

Runner Up: Marisa Lingerie: Strip.
Look, there wasn't much to pick from Interactive this week (yes, you can ride the entire tour de France by bashing your phone repeatedly with your thumbs!) so the runner up is from those cheeky South Americans who've come up with the idea that by purchasing your wife or girlfriend lingerie from a stunning interactive Playboy model, she'll remove the same lingerie so you presumably get some sort of guilty thrill. I'm not going to go into the strategy or the odd morality of the thing, it's the media placement I'm interested in. Playboy? Isn't charging for a striptease in there like trying to sell someone a chocolate bar in a chocolate factory?

Look, I'm tired and this has to be sent in tonight so I'll give the site a thorough inspection and come up with a more considered argument in the morning. N'night.




This week's guest judge is Andy Flemming, creative director, M&C Saatchi, Sydney.

My son left England in 1992, where he'd worked for absolutely no money at various big London companies who really should have paid him. Really. At the very least he could have got a trade. You know, something with his hands.

After we bankrolled his trip to Sydney, he worked at Chiat/Day/Mojo and wrote some lovely commercials including one with the funny band from that film.

Rather than coming home, he worked in Hong Kong and Singapore for a few years before moving to George Patterson Melbourne, then Sydney, then became creative director at either Saatchi and Saatchi, or M&C Saatchi. One of those.

He did that really nice spot for Optus with the Whale in it, a big football one and some others that I've forgotten. Oh, a lovely poem with that woman from the Sixth Sense film. The JR poster was nice. We always loved Dallas. The show. Not the place. That was where they shot Kennedy.

He won lots of awards. Can, DAD, OneShoe and others he can’t be bothered to tell us about. He never calls. And we know he's on Skype. His name comes up.

They seem to like him where he works. That's important because of the recession.

He judges stuff, lectures and wrote us a lovely email about the weather. The weather here is awful. Just awful. Anyway. Got to run. We're taking the dog out for a wee.